Episode 5 - 10 Funniest Quotes by Ronald Reagan

In this follow up to the previous episode on Reagan's "A Time for Choosing" speech, I look at some of the wittiest moments in Reagan's political career.

1. From a 1986 News Conference:

“The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, ‘I’m from the government and I’m here to help”

2. As Governor of California, here's how Reagan described the protesters at Berkeley University:

“A hippie is someone who looks like Tarzan, walks like Jane and smells like Cheetah"

3. On the occasion of his 73rd birthday Reagan said:

"Thomas Jefferson once said, 'We should never judge a president by his age, only by his works.' And ever since he told me that, I stopped worrying.”

4. After the press reported that Reagan had supposedly dosed off during a cabinet meeting, Reagan famously said

"I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I’m in a cabinet meeting."

5. At a White House conference on small business, President Reagan said:

“The government’s view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. (and the punchline of the speech was, wait for it, wait for it.) And if it stops moving, subsidize it.”

6. On the subject of taxes, Reagan said.

"Republicans believe every day is the Fourth of July, but the democrats believe every day is April 15."

7. On the subject of Congress, Reagan said:

*I have wondered at times what the Ten Commandments would have looked like if Moses had run them through the US Congress."

8. In his 1987 Remarks to the Annual Convention of Concerned Women for America, Ronald Reagan brilliantly lambasted Communism saying

"If the Soviet Union let another political party come into existence, they would still be a one-party state."

9. The Gipper sums up politics:

“It has been said that politics is the second oldest profession. I have learned that it bears a striking resemblance to the first.”

10. Said during a radio microphone test for his weekly Saturday morning address in 1984:

"My fellow Americans, I am pleased to tell you I just signed legislation which outlaws The Soviet Union forever. The bombing begins in five minutes."

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